…That’s right!…True friendship costs nothing but is worth everything,weighs nothing but can last a lifetime.

Worth a lifetime

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Who are your friends?

There is a very famous or should I say familiar Japanese Proverb that goes, “When the character of a man is not clear,look at his friends.” You are or become who you closely associate with. Have you noticed that a clique of friends behave, talk or even dress almost the same!… (Still a mystery to me!)

Was hanging out with a couple of friends last week and one of them said that he has been in a season of weeding out certain friends. I found this remarkable.In this life,there are friends who add value to your life,esteem your values and principles and make you a better version of yourself and there are those who tear you down,leaving you high and dry,go against your values and principles and lead you astray.Now these are weeds. “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.”  (1 Corinthians 15:33,NIV)

After every exam period,I always have a little chit-chat with small brother.Two weeks ago,he did one and his performance wasn’t quite the expected.His ‘best-friend’ performed much better and the first thing he told me was, “Every time he defeats me,he behaves queerly,he does not relate with me normally as he always does.He distances himself from me.” (He told me all this very emotionally,you can imagine the pain).I am glad he noticed this because that’s a red flag.His so called ‘best-friend’ does not warrant that title in the first place.At this tender age it does help to be alert,that way future hurts are avoided.Funny thing about him is that despite all the flaws exhibited by his ‘best-friend’ he always has a way of accommodating him.This reminds me of a quote by Abraham Lincoln on character,“We should be too big to take offense and too noble to give it.” highlighted something very interesting on the subject of friendship I thought I should share with you…There are 2 kinds of friends,those who:

Who are your friends based on the above categories and as a friend what kind are you?The first or the second?

No man is an island.That’s a given.We need people in our lives,those we can open up to in our pains and frustrations and share our victories and joys with.Those that are always there to give a listening ear and lend a shoulder sincerely without having to spill out our secrets to others behind our backs.I am one person who values quality over quantity and an expert at weeding out those who do not add to what I stand for or believe in(That’s just me). “A large number of friends do not equal help in time of need”(…Ask the celebrities…whenever a scandal arises the fans turn their backs against them.

Lately,I have been reading The Unashamed Devotional by Lecrae and on relationships,this is what he wrote,

To live in the reality of being created in the image and likeness of God and to understand that truth isn’t about being perfect.You don’t even need to be.It’s not about trying to fix yourself and it’s not about going through life alone either.We were built for relationships.Its about being honest with yourself and saying, “Maybe I don’t have it all together.”We need to realize that we are weak and we need each other.We need God.We need a community of people to keep us consistent and help us grow to be the person we have been created to be.

Two very important aspects of friendship are highlighted above:

  • Consistency
  • Growth

Is your friendship helping you remain consistent or are you trying to be someone else to fit in?…Is your friendship growing you to be the best you can be?…As a friend are you contributing to the consistency of the other as well as his/her growth?

Lets look at a scripture to back the above up…Hebrews 10:24-25(NIV), “And let us consider how we may spur one another on towards love and good deeds.Let us not give up meeting together,as some are in the habit of doing but let us encourage one another and all the more as you see the Day approaching”

From the above scripture,three things are highlighted:

  • Spurring one another towards love and good deeds
  • Meeting together(so refreshing)
  • Encouraging one another-Ecclesiastes 4:10 explains this quite clearly, “If one falls down, his friend can help him up.But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!”

In summary,true friendship embodies but is not limited to the following from our study today:

  • Growth
  • Consistency
  • Bonding(make time for each other as friends)
  • Encouragement
  • Spurring each other towards love and good deeds

Before I call it a day or should I say a week!😁 allow me to encourage us to first and foremost nourish our friendship with Jesus Christ.In Him we live,move and have our being.He never fails us.Our true-friends/best-friends/ride-or-dies are human with human limitations.We do not expect them to exhibit perfection like Christ does.As long as we derive our joy from an everlasting and enduring relationship with God, it is then that we experience a paradigm shift.

Remember this friends,He will never leave you nor forsake you.

I conclude with a saying by King Solomon in the book of Proverbs 18:24,

“A man of many companions may come to ruin,but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”


Who are your friends and what kind of a friend are you?

Think about this.

Have an amazing week ahead!

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